Sunday, May 1, 2011

Things I did last night...

1.  Dye my hair using "Nice and Easy" foam.    In the commercial the foam doesn't drip and there is a cloud.   In real life, I squeezed the bottle too hard with my Lennie from "Mice and Men" 'tard strength, exploded the foam everywhere and cursed loudly while cleaning it up, realizing somewhere in the back of my mind that ammonia and bleach, when mixed, create a toxic gas.   I pictured being found dead and naked in the bathroom with foam in my hair.  Frantically checking I realized the color was no ammonia.   Phew.

2. Walked through the Ghetto in my tight LBD with Chris in a bow tie and tails.   Was subject to several cat-calls, but was disappointed most were directed at "Mr. Bow tie."  The Beyonce swagger in my walk died a little.

3.  Went to the Black Box Awards as Chris's date.  Loaded up on Franzia, and still partially frozen cocktail shrimp.   Told Chris I would scream "I love you, Baby" if he won best actor, which he did.  When he sat back down I told him, "Good, because I don't talk to losers."

5.  Popped the champagne I brought in my purse during Chris's acceptance speech.  Yes.   Keep it classy.   I am your dream girl.

4.  Yelled more classy things like, "Steve, I will have you!"  when Chris's super shy roommate, Steve, presented awards.

5.  Butt-dialed.   A lot.

6.  Danced/sang-along to "Walking on Broken Glass" by Annie Lennox.   Also pointed out that I am "Annie" as well.

7. Pounded a cupcake right before bed.

8. Woke up at 5 am with a pounding headache...decided the wine sugar/ cupcake sugar were combining to punish me.    Drank a lot of water while watching informercials for the Magic Bullet.   Cringed every time Margarita mix or raw eggs were shown.  Made a mental vow never to drink again.   Realize will not  keep vow.

1 comment: